OK, try this: On one side of a piece of paper, “write down all the aspects of your life in which you like having choice. On the back, list all the aspects in which you would prefer not to have choice, or to have someone choose for you.” Dr. Sheena Iyengar, whom I’m quoting, did this experiment with American and Japanese students and found that Americans “preferred personal choice in four times as many domains of life as did the Japanese.” Are you trying to exercise choice in areas that drain your energy and aren’t necessary? I let my garden designer choose the plants for my little condo yard because I just want it to look nice. For someone else, that would be a vital area of control. Look again at your lists. How much time and energy would you regain if you let go of one type of choice?